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The water cooler is the place for fun, jokes, games, and anything else designed to be as non-serious as possible. Feel free to browse and enjoy. Laugh a little before you return to the real world.
Have you a put a smile on someone's face today?
Fun Pics
These are bound to crack at least a grin...
-Fun Pics
Hysterical Error Pages
Ever see those dreaded 404 errors when the server can't find the page you are looking for? When you type the wrong address or the website goes offline? Well heres some rather creative versions of these.
-An Insulting Server
-Apologetic Server
The end of the internet
Ever wondered what would happen if you reached the end of the internet? Well, here it is, with instructions on getting back to the beginning of the internet.
-The end of the internet
Lets watch a little magic.
This Flash attraction is absolutely fantastic. Not only is it VERY well done, but it is a great joke you can play on your friends. Be sure to locate the instructions once it has loaded all the way. Theres a button at the bottom of the screen labeled isntructions. Visit...
-Zandar the Great!
Ever wonder what those advertising terms really mean?
New - Different color from previous design.
All New - Parts are not interchangeable with previous design.
Foolproof Operation- No provision for adjustments.
Advanced Design - The advertising agency doesn’t understand it.
Redesigned- Previous flaws fixed - we hope.
Years of Development - We finally got one to work.
Maintenance Free - Impossible to fix.
Meets All Standards - Ours, not yours.
Solid-State- Weighs two tons.
12 Step Recovery Program For Web Addicts
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I will have a cup of coffee in the morning and read my PAPER newspaper like I used to, before the Web.
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I will eat breakfast with a knife and fork and not with one hand typing.
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I will get dressed before noon.
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I will make an attempt to clean the house, wash clothes, and plan dinner before even thinking of the Web.
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I will sit down and write a letter to those unfortunate few friends and family that are Web-deprived.
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I will call someone on the phone who I cannot contact via the Web.
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I will read a book... if I still remember how.
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I will listen to those around me about their needs and stop telling them to turn the TV down so I can hear the music on the Web.
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I will not be tempted during TV commercials to check for email.
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I will try and get out of the house at least once a week, if it is necessary or not.
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I will remember that my bank is not forgiving if I forget to balance my checkbook because I was too busy on the Web.
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Last, but not least, I will remember that I must go to bed sometime... and the Web will always be there tomorrow.
43 Ways to Mess With People in a Computer Lab!
- Log on, wait a sec, then get a frightened look on your face and scream "Oh my God! They've found me!" and bolt.
- Laugh uncontrollably for about 3 minutes & then suddenly stop and look suspiciously at everyone who looks at you.
- When your computer is turned off, complain to the monitor on duty that you can't get the darn thing to work. After he/she's turned it on, wait 5 minutes, turn it off again, & repeat the process for a good half hour.
- Type frantically, often stopping to look at the person next to you evilly.
- Before anyone else is in the lab, connect each computer to different screen than the one it's set up with.
- Write a program that plays the "Smurfs" theme song and play it at the highest volume possible over & over again.
- Work normally for a while. Suddenly look amazingly startled by something on the screen and crawl underneath the desk.
- Ask the person next to you if they know how to tap into top-secret Pentagon files.
- Use Interactive Send to make passes at people you don't know.
- Make a small ritual sacrifice to the computer before you turn it on.
- Bring a chainsaw, but don't use it. If anyone asks why you have it, say "Just in case..." mysteriously.
- Ask around for a spare disk. Offer $2. Keep asking until someone agrees. Then, pull a disk out of your back pocket and say "Oops, I forgot."
- Every time you press Return and there is processing time required, pray "Ohpleaseohpleaseohpleaseohplease," and scream "YES!" when it finishes.
- "DISK FIGHT!!!"
- Put a straw in your mouth and put your hands in your pockets. Type by hitting the keys with the straw.
- If you're sitting in a swivel chair, spin around singing "The Lion Sleeps Tonight" whenever there is processing time required.
- Try to stick a Nintendo cartridge into the 3 disc drive, when it doesn't work, get the supervisor.
- When you are on an IBM, and when you turn it on, ask loudly where the smiling Apple face is when you turn on one of those.
- Print out the complete works of Shakespeare, then when its all done (two days later) say that all you wanted was one line.
- Stare at the screen, grind your teeth, stop, look at the person next to you, grinding. Repeat procedure, making sure you never provoke the person enough to let them blow up, as this releases tension, and it is far more effective to let them linger.
- If you have long hair, take a typing break, look for split ends, cut them and deposit them on your neighbor's keyboard as you leave.
- Put a large, gold-framed portrait of the British Royal Family on your desk and loudly proclaim that it inspires you.
- Come to the lab wearing several layers of socks. Remove shoes and place them of top of the monitor. Remove socks layer by layer and drape them around the monitor. Exclaim sudden haiku about the aesthetic beauty of cotton on plastic.
- Take the keyboard and sit under the computer. Type up your paper like this. Then go to the lab supervisor and complain about the bad working conditions.
- Laugh hysterically, shout "You will all perish in flames!!!" and continue working.
- Bring some dry ice & make it look like your computer is smoking.
- Assign a musical note to every key (ie. the Delete key is A Flat, the B key is F
sharp, etc.). Whenever you hit a key, humits note loudly. Write an entire paper this way.
- Attempt to eat your computer's mouse.
- Borrow someone else's keyboard by reaching over, saying "Excuse me, mind if I borrow this for a sec?", unplugging the keyboard & taking it.
- Bring in a bunch of magnets and have fun.
- When doing calculations, pull out an abacus and say that sometimes the old ways are best.
- Play Pong for hours on the most powerful computer in the lab.
- Make a loud noise of hitting the same key over and over again until you see that your neighbor is noticing (You can hit the space bar so your fill isn't affected). Then look at your neighbor's keyboard. Hit his/her delete key several times, erasing an entire word. While you do this, ask: "Does *your* delete key work?" Shake your head, and resume hitting the space bar on your keyboard. Keep doing this until you've deleted about a page of your neighbor's document. Then, suddenly exclaim: "Well, whaddya know? I've been hitting the space bar this whole time. No wonder it wasn't deleting! Ha!" Print out your document and leave.
- Remove your disk from the drive and hide it. Go to the lab monitor and complain that your computer ate your disk. (For special effects, put some Elmer's Glue on or around the disk drive. Claim that the computer is drooling.)
- Stare at the person's next to your's screen, look really puzzled, burst out laughing, and say "You did that?" loudly. Keep laughing, grab your stuff and leave, howling as you go.
- Point at the screen. Chant in a made up language while making elaborate hand gestures for a minute or two. Press return or the mouse, then leap back and yell "COVEEEEERRRRRR!" peek up from under the table, walk back to the computer and say. "Oh, good. It worked this time," and calmly start to type again.
- Keep looking at invisible bugs and trying to swat them.
- See who's online. Send a total stranger a talk request. Talk to them like you've known them all your lives. Hang up before they get a chance to figure out you're a total stranger.
- Bring an small tape player with a tape of really absurd sound effects. Pretend it's the computer and look really lost.
- Pull out a pencil. Start writing on the screen. Complain that the lead doesn't work
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- Come into the computer lab wearing several endangered species of flowers in your hair. Smile incessantly. Type a sentence, then laugh happily, exclaim "You're such a marvel!!", and kiss the screen. Repeat this after every sentence. As your ecstasy mounts, also hug the keyboard. Finally, hug your neighbor, then the computer assistant, and walk out.
- Run into the computer lab, shout "Armageddon is here!!!!!", then calmly sit down and begin to type.
- Quietly walk into the computer lab with a Black and Decker chainsaw, rev that baby up, and then walk up to the nearest person and say "Give me that computer or you'll be feeding my pet crocodile for the next week".
You may be a Geek if…
> You find yourself interrupting computer store salesmen to correct something they say.
> You’ve named your computer.
> You have your local computer store on speed dial.
> You can’t carry on a conversation without talking about computers.
> Co-workers have to e-mail you about the fire alarm to get you out of the building.
> You’ve ever found “stray” diskettes when doing laundry.
> Your computer has it’s own phone line - but your teenager doesn’t.
> You check the national weather service web page for current weather conditions (rather than look out the window).
> You know more URLs than street addresses.
> Your pet has a web page.
> You get really excited when Yahoo adds your link.
> The tech support folks at your ISP call YOU for the tough ones.
> You have more than one copy of the same version of software on your machine.
> You have ever chatted with someone while talking to them on the phone.
> You are surprised that there are other real foods besides pizza.
> You have ever sent E-mail to someone sitting next to you.
> You have ever had a dream involving computers.
> You have ever modified an .ini file.
> You would sell your grandmother for more bandwidth.
> You start tilting your head sideways to smile.
> You have ever e-mailed yourself.
> You get up at 3:00AM to go to the bathroom and stop to check your E-mail on your way back to bed.
> You’ve entered that USR X2 contest so many times you get e-mail saying “Forget it, Mike you are not going to win, just go buy the modem”.
> You know what the USR X2 contest is.
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